Appearance has always been a major component of golf. Many courses include some version of dress code. An argument can be made that rigid dress requirements have helped preserve the integrity of the sport. However, alongside this heritage of professional appearance, there has emerged a counter-movement. After all, Newton’s third law mandates that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.
When this counter-movement first emerged is unclear. Nonetheless, this movement predates the likes of Rickie Fowler in his all-orange outfits. Golfers like John Daly have been pushing the appearances of golf for decades. Now companies like Loudmouth exist solely to produce outrageous and over-the-top designs and styles. The flamboyantly dressed golfer has become almost commonplace.
Golfers today will have to be more creative than bold colors, and strange patterns to truly stand out amongst the competition. If you find yourself searching for the next evolution of golf outfits, the future of the industry, and the bleeding edge of style and performance, then this is certainly not the article for you. Instead, this article is the culmination of the ugliest articles of clothing for you to laugh at, to share, and potentially to buy as a cruel gift for someone you know.
Hat
Golf hats come in a wide variety of options. There are classic conservative styles, as well as bold colorful choices. Searching for the perfect hat for this list was difficult. There are hats with fake hair, hats with dioramas, and even hats that look like a golf ball. A purposely humorous hat does not follow the goal we set out with, so we kept searching.
Then, we found this hat. Called the Happy & Healthy Head Wear, this product answers the question no one asked; “What if my hat was also an umbrella?”. This pinnacle of engineering keeps your hands free for golfing, while also protecting you from rain and flirtatious advances. This hat will be the cornerstone of the entire outfit.
Shirt
Golf polos can be found in a vast array of styles. The “ugly on purpose” aesthetic is certainly pronounced in this section of golf attire. Hence, it became a challenge to dig deep to find a truly horrendous golf shirt. Eventually, we found what we were searching for. Direct from the nightclub scene, comes this incredible shirt. The shiny gold color will truly set you apart from the rest.
Belt
Once again, we set out on a quest to find the ugliest belt we could. There were sparkly belts, rainbow belts, and more. However, we settled on the logical successor to an American classic. Put aside your rattlesnake belt and go ahead and purchase this genuine python skin belt. The reptile scales will glimmer perfectly from the light shining through your umbrella hat and the blinding light reflecting off your gold foil shirt.
Pants
Finding the ugliest golf pants required thinking outside the box. Any classically ugly pattern or color is already a successful product line. John Daly actively competes in some of the most atrociously ugly golf pants ever made. Luckily through dedicated research and hard work, the perfect pants for this list were found. We present these $800 multi-color crochet pants. These truly stand out amongst the rest and will surely get looks even by the most flamboyant.
Shoes
These shoes may have inspired this entire list. No golf shoes compare to the sheer audacity of these. What do you get when you combine “toe shoes” with golf cleats? You get these abominations…
Now, if a brave enough soul were to purchase all these items and wear them together, they’d truly have the ugliest golf outfit ever made!
